My journey to a healthier me

Tales of my life

5 years ago today …

on August 26, 2014

5 years ago today I was sitting in a doctor’s office …

5 years ago today I was anxiously and fearfully waiting for test results …

5 years ago today I heard the words I never thought I’d hear …

5 years ago today I learned I had cancer.

5 years ago today my journey to change my life and be a healthier person began.

 

Growing up, I never feared cancer.  It doesn’t run in my family, so I never really gave it much thought.  What scared me was heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, and high cholesterol.  Those were/are the things that run in my family.

I’d known for many years that I was leading an unhealthy lifestyle.  I was very overweight; I was pretty sedentary; I ate a lot of junk food/overly-processed food.  I’d try different diets, but would ultimately go back to my old ways.  I’d try to be more active, but again, I’d eventually give up and go back to being a couch potato.  Deep down, I think I knew that some day something would have to change.  But it wasn’t enough to make me want to change.

Growing up, I shied away from cameras.  I didn’t like my pictures taken.  I didn’t like how I looked in them.  Even my wedding pictures. But it wasn’t enough to make me really want to do something about it.

I often had trouble finding clothes that fit properly.  It seemed like all the stylish stuff, all the pretty stuff, was for “normal” size women, not for someone like me.  But it wasn’t enough to make me really want to change.

My mom started getting sick when I was in my 20s, she was in her late 40s (not much older than I am now).  She had problems with her heart.  Over the years, she had a few heart attacks and strokes.  And she was a diabetic, and had issues with that too.  But it wasn’t enough to make me really want to take better care of myself.

When I was 38, I started getting sick.  I knew something was wrong, but I was scared to find out what it was.  I suffered for close to a year before finally talking to my doctor.  I have a great doctor.  He really listened to me.  He sent me for tests.  When those results came back, he explained that there was an anomaly so I needed to go for another test.  He said it could be a number of things, and not to panic.  Hopefully the second test will give us the answer.  The second test revealed the cancer.

And that was enough.

That was enough to make me realize that that day was the day.

And so it began.

That day was the day my journey to a healthier me began.

5 years ago today.

What a ride it has been.  Lots of ups and downs, twists and turns.  I’ve learned a lot, about life and about myself.  I’ve done a lot, more than I ever dreamed possible.  And I’m not done yet.  There is still so much I want/need to do.

The universe has repeatedly tested me to make sure I’m serious and I’m not giving up. Seriously, universe, you can stop that now, I’m not giving up!

Along the way, I’ve made new friends, and lost a few old ones.  I’ve taken a few detours, but have managed to find my way back.   I’ve laughed a lot and cried a lot.

And through it all, I’ve learned I’m much stronger than I ever realized.  I’ve become a much better version of myself.  I feel like I’ve found myself.

5 years ago today my world changed.

And I wouldn’t want it any other way.

 

 

 

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