My journey to a healthier me

Tales of my life

Progress report

on November 19, 2013

Okay, I know it’s been awhile since I posted anything. Well, I’ve posted a few stories about my community, but nothing really about my journey. I think that’s partly because I haven’t felt like I’ve had anything to really share, and partly because I’m not really happy with my progress lately.

It’s hard doing all this on my own. Harder than I realized it would be. I’m trying. I’m really trying. But I don’t feel like I’m really getting anywhere.

I’ve put my strength training on hold for awhile. It was going well. I mean really well. Perhaps too well. I felt like my cardio was suffering. I felt like I was giving too much precedence to the strength training. So I put a halt to it to concentrate on cardio. Once I get my cardio back to what I think is acceptable, then I’ll add the strength training back in.

For a while when the weather was nice, I was opting to do my cardio outside. We had some beautiful fall weather so it was nice walking outside. When the weather wasn’t so good, I used the indoor track at our local sports centre. But I still didn’t feel like I was making progress, so I signed up to do a 5k for a local charity.  It was cold and rainy on race day, but I was still out there.  And I did better than I thought I would.  I was pretty proud of myself.

In the summer, I strained the arch on my right foot.  Not pleasant.  I had to stop jogging.  I had to stop using the treadmill and the elliptical and the stair stepper.  The only cardio machine I could use was the AMT.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good hard workout.  But after a while, I was getting bored.  And maybe that’s why my cardio started to suffer a bit in favour of strength training.  Or at least part of the reason.

Anyway, after getting custom orthotics for my shoes, my foot started feeling better.  It’s now at a point were it feels almost normal again.  So I figured it was okay to start jogging again.  But I don’t want to injure myself again, so I’m taking it slow.  Building up the length of time I’m jogging before I build up speed.  Seems to be going well so far.

But I still feel like something is missing.  I don’t know what it is.  Some days I feel lost.  I’m trying my best.  I really am.  I hope I’m making progress.  But I don’t know.  When I look in the mirror, I don’t look any different.  The scale is still stuck.  I’m trying not to focus on that, but it’s hard not to think about it.  There are days when I just don’t want to get out of bed.  But I do.  I force myself to go to the gym, or if the weather is good, go for a walk.  Or maybe go to the sports centre and use the track.

Maybe I need to branch out, try different things.  Maybe finally use the pool at the sports centre.  Maybe take a class like yoga.  Maybe I need a new environment to workout in.  I don’t know.

I just wish I felt like I was making better progress.  I wish I felt like I was okay.  I’m hoping this is just a phase, just a funk that I’m in.  I’m hoping it will pass soon.  I don’t like feeling like this.  I’m not giving up, but some days I feel like I’m on the edge.

This is just a phase.

This will pass.

I will be okay.

I will keep going.

I won’t give up.

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