My journey to a healthier me

Tales of my life

It’s been 6 months …

Six months ago my life changed forever … changed for the better. It has been 6 months today. Just 6 months since that first workout with Tyler, yet it seems like forever. How did I get so lucky to find a friend and trainer like him. And yes, it’s friend first, at least that is how I see it. I remember being really nervous that first day. And I remember being sore for three days after! But it was a good sore. I was so proud of myself. Sure, I had been taking his classes for a couple of weeks, but this was one-on-one, and it was something I’d never done before. Truth be told, it’s something I never thought I’d do. I never thought I’d be the type of person to have a personal trainer. I had always thought they were for celebrities and other rich people. Boy, was I wrong! Anyone and everyone can benefit from having a personal trainer. They just need to be serious about working out. They need to make a commitment to themselves; they have to want to change; they have to want to be fitter, healthier. Now I know why my efforts in the past always failed, why I never seemed to get anywhere when I tried it on my own. It’s because I didn’t have someone like Tyler. Someone to show me the right way to do things, someone to show me that I’m not beyond hope, someone who has confidence in me, someone to help me find the confidence within myself. Okay, that may sound a bit over the top, but really it’s not. I’m not sure I can really explain it. Tyler has given more to me in the last 6 months than I ever found on my own. He thinks I give him too much credit and not enough to myself. Well, maybe that’s true to some degree, but I also know myself. Without his help these last months, I would have given up. I would have given up when I hit the first wall, the first plateau. I would have gone back to the old me. But with his help, I’m finding a new me, a better me. He has shown me that I’m stronger than I thought I was. I have more confidence than ever before. I feel happier. I smile more, laugh more. Those things may not mean much to you, but they mean the world to me. I like to say he is the 2nd best thing to ever happen to me (my husband, of course, is the best thing). I’m doing things I never thought I would be able to do, or at least not anytime soon. I’m thinking in ways I never did before. My perspective has changed, is still changing. My whole life has changed. And I love it! I never thought I’d love going to the gym, I never thought I’d love working out. And yet I do. I laugh sometimes when I think about how much I’ve changed. I wonder sometimes what people from my past would think of me now. People who knew me as a painfully shy girl who spent most of her time in her room. People who knew me in school, who picked on me, who made fun of me. What would they think of me now. Would they still make fun of me? Would they still pick on me? I’m certainly not the same person I was back then … but then again, they probably are not the same either. At least I would hope not. Those that know me (or regular readers of my blog) might be saying “But you’ve been going to the gym for longer than 6 months.” Yes, that’s true. I started going to the gym in mid-January. But I didn’t make much progress on my own. I didn’t really make progress until I met Tyler, when I started taking his classes. But things really changed when I got the courage to ask him for help, to ask him to take me on as a client. And although I didn’t really know what I was getting myself into, I don’t regret a minute of it. I feel truly blessed to have him in my life. I hope he realizes what an impact he had on me when I first met him, and continues to have on me. I can’t thank him enough for all he has done and continues to do for me. Okay, I’m getting a little sentimental now. Anyway, so here we are, 6 months later and I have no plans to stop. I’m learning so much and having a lot of fun doing it. I continue to impress myself with the things I can do. Sometimes Tyler tells me what he wants me to do and I look at him like he’s crazy LOL. But he says to trust him so I try it and I’m amazed that I can do it. And sometimes we will be working with weights, and I’ll say something like “really? Is that all?” or another similar smart-ass remark, and he’ll look at me like he can’t believe I said that and add more weights or give me heavier ones. And I usually laugh. I love that we can tease each other. We work hard, but we have fun as we are doing it. That’s one of my favourite things. And while he is never mean, he doesn’t take any crap from me. I may think I can’t do something, but he makes me try it. Sometimes I can do it, sometimes I struggle with it. But then we know that’s something for us to work on. I may think I know what my limits are, but he continually shows me that I don’t. And that’s a great thing. And sometimes I want to push myself farther. Sometimes he lets me, sometimes he doesn’t. He doesn’t want me to get hurt. I don’t want me to get hurt either, but I’m stubborn and if he wasn’t there, I’d probably try it anyway. So it’s a good thing that he’s there. And I hope he’ll be there for a very long time to come.

Okay, I’ve been rambling on for a while here, so I guess I’ll stop now. I just want to say thank you to Tyler … Thank you for everything … I owe you so much, more than I can really say. And to say I’m in this for the long haul and I hope you are too. Here’s to the future, my friend.

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Happy Birthday to me — Reflections on the past year

It’s my favourite time of year — summer is coming to an end and fall is getting ready to start. This has always been my favourite time of year, even when I was in school. I love the crispness in the air, the apples that seem to be everywhere, the changing colors of the leaves. I love it all. Mainly I love this time of year because my birthday is in September. And who doesn’t love their birthday? Well for a while, I didn’t. Okay, that’s not true. I liked my birthday, but didn’t really enjoy it as I should have. I was always tired. Some years I was sick. I wasn’t always happy with myself. But regardless, I have always used this time of year to reflect. I would look at myself and what I’ve done over the last 12 months. Am I happy with what I did? Did I do anything extraordinary? Did I go anywhere exciting? Did I overcome anything? What was the best part of the year? What was the worst? What would I change if I could? Most importantly, I would think about what I’d like to see happen in the next year. Now a lot of people do this kind of thing at New Years or just before. I do that too, but for some reason I’ve always chosen to do it around my birthday as well.

So since my birthday is upon me, what do I think of the last year?

Well, I have to say I’m pretty damn happy with myself. Even though there have been a few downs this year, I’m happy to say there have been mostly ups. I’ve really amazed myself. And I’m pretty proud of myself.

And what did I do to be so proud? Well …

I joined a gym. (and then a second one when the first one closed)
I’ve been exercising regularly.
I’m eating better than I have in a very long time (maybe ever).
I participated in and finished my very first 5k walk.
I’ve lost quite a bit of weight. (actually I got rid of it … I have no intention of ever finding it again)
I walked a bridge that used to scare me to even drive over.

I think any of those would be something to be proud of, but all together, they are amazing!

Some other highlights of the year …

I made some wonderful new friends.
I once again found my passion for writing. (it wasn’t lost, it was just hiding)
I discovered a new genre of books to enjoy. (thank you, Tyler and Nick)

And probably most important, I’m discovering that I’m much stronger than I ever thought I was — both physically and mentally. Maybe it’s really true what they say, wisdom comes with age (hahaha).

Sometimes when I look in the mirror, I don’t recognize the person I see. I know it’s me, but I’ve changed so much that sometimes it startles me a little. And I’m not just talking about the physical changes, although that really amazes me too. I’m talking more about the inner changes. I had a hard time dealing with things when my mom died. I wasn’t sure how I would ever get through. But I did. And I think I’m so much stronger now. I’d like to think she is watching over me and is happy with what she sees. I think she would be proud of me. A lot of stuff has happened, not just in the last year but really in the last three years, but every bit of it has helped me become the person I am now and still becoming. I think back to who I was 5 years ago, 10 years, 20 years. I almost don’t recognize that person. I’m happier now at 42, then I think I was at half my age. The lessons I’ve learned this past year (and am still learning) are ones I wish I could have learned sooner. But then again, I’m not sure I would have been ready to learn earlier. Maybe I needed to grow up more, mature more, go through some hard times first before I was ready to learn them. And maybe that’s why I’ve been so successful this year on my journey to be healthier me. In the end, it doesn’t really matter. What matters is, I am succeeding. I’m becoming the healthy person I want to be.

So here’s to another great year. Hopefully a year filled with excitement, love, friendship, happiness, and joy. A year filled with more success in my journey. A year where I conquer more challenges. A year where I become even more of the person I always wanted to be.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

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